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How Cognitive Hypnotherapy & Neurolinguistic Programming (NLP) can assist those Dyslexic Individuals with Low Self Esteem and Confidence

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Neurodiversity Celebration Week
18th - 24th March 2024

Being Dyslexic means that my thoughts are never linear and are very much like all the items in a jumble sale, or perhaps like walking into your local Zara on a Saturday afternoon – absolute chaos, with clothes strewn everywhere.  This is very much like my brain…the thoughts are great, but there is no orderly fashion.

I’ve resourcefully created a mind map for this article with a beginning, middle and end and numbered them accordingly so I don’t lose myself in my own story, sticking only to what needs to be said.  I read the Mr Men Topsy Turvey book to my son recently and died laughing as I could wholly resonate with his thinking!  Now, you might think that what I just detailed are my weaknesses, but you would be very wrong, these are very much my strengths and are what makes me stand out from others.

Let’s start from the beginning…the word Neurodiversity was coined by an Australian lady named Judy Singer, recognising that everyone’s brain develops in a unique way.   As QCH therapists (Questies) we know only too well that every client we see is unique, as is their problem;  this is also the case in any diagnosis of neurodivergence.  Thankfully, QCH therapist’s learned skillset helps us to navigate this, as we work with the client’s map of the world.

When talking about an individual, you’d use the term neurodivergent.  Diversity is a property of groups not a person, so to refer to someone as neurodiverse is incorrect.  Recently I had to check in with myself as I found myself feeling fairly angry about the word Neurodivergent, but couldn’t quite fathom why? It turns out, after asking the golden question ‘what’s that all about?’  that I was annoyed that it took till the late 90s for someone to identify this term, which has in turn led to the creation of a community that helps fight the stigma against autism, ADHD and other learning disabilities like dyslexia.  I have discovered that the neurodivergent movement has in fact promoted wide discussion and led to support being provided, so I’ll lick my 1980’s wounds and get on board with this new-fangled term, as it’s a great community where stories, strengths, achievements and laughter is shared.

As Dyslexia is my area of knowledge and passion I will be discussing mostly this.  To date, should you seek it, there is much more assistance available to dyslexic children and adults than there has ever been.  Coping strategies are taught to assist in both school and the workplace, but one thing which persists is that many children, teenagers and adults with dyslexia struggle with low self-esteem.  Low self-esteem or confidence often stems from the very early stages in education when there are difficulties or struggles, frustration or an inability to understand, to grasp or fit in. It is understood that many neurodivergent individuals are very good at ‘masking’ behaviours or developing self-taught coping mechanisms.   In the instance of dyslexia, late diagnosis or even being left undiagnosed can (and the emphasis on the word can, as we don’t know it to be true for everyone) leave individuals feeling incapable, not smart or to develop the core belief that they are not good enough.

In my work as a QCH therapist, I work with all clients on their self-limiting beliefs, but my passion lies in helping those with dyslexia. I am making it the focus of my work to use what I have been taught to assist others; it’s something I feel very passionate about.  With my Questie tools, which include many from Positive Psychology, I am able to help clients identify their strengths and change their narrative and outlook.

Rebuilding self-esteem may take some time, but the key is to take small steps by helping clients to connect with what they enjoy or what they used to enjoy. For example, do they have any interests, such as sports, art, hobbies etc.?  It helps to listen to what my clients talk about a lot, and perhaps suggest they become involved in volunteering, or maybe focus on their entrepreneurial skills in that area, if they want to start a business.

Dyslexic individuals shouldn’t compare themselves to others – this just leads to pressure and can have a negative effect with the risk of developing anxiety. In the case of children and teenagers, focusing on their tests or grades will never help, or the size of their output.  With Dyslexia, it is all about quality over quantity – did they understand the question and are they able to answer it in a concise, linear manner, is much more important than word count.  A key point is that, as with everyone, someone who has dyslexia has ownership over something they are good at, the chances are it will spill into other areas in their lives and the confidence will grow.

Monitoring progress is essential, as is looking back at any achievements. It’s funny how we often forget to do this,  so busy are we, charging ahead with our lives. The most important thing of all is listening to the individual’s language. Is it useful, does it serve a purpose, would you say those things to a best friend? Helping clients become aware of their language, perhaps by journalling, is helpful. I’ve heard the following statements from dyslexics: “Why can’t my brain work properly?”, “why can’t I be like everyone else?.  I like to refer to this negative narrative as an app that hasn’t been switched off – if left on over time it will drain the battery.  Helping clients to become aware of their narrative helps them to change it – as we intuitively know, our thoughts create our behaviours!

There is a genius in all dyslexic individuals. We are wired differently, so we see things differently, which enables us to thrive in certain environments that others cannot.  I’m a fan of the #MadeByDyslexia charity – backed by Kate Briggs and Richard Branson, both of whom have dyslexia – aimed at empowering dyslexic thinking.  There was an article recently with celebrity chef Marc Murphey and how he uses his dyslexic thinking in the kitchen to his advantage, in order to keep the plates spinning.  Dyslexics struggle with sequencing or following instructions (see my earlier comment about mind mapping my article), but the intuitive aspect to our way of thinking helps us to excel in multisensory environments, which I find particularly interesting, and which resonates with me – I have had a very rewarding career in television broadcasting and have often compared the work in the tv gallery as being similar to that of a high-octane Michelin-starred kitchen.

New research by the University of Strathclyde has found that people with dyslexia are much better at being curious and exploring new ideas and are more likely to be found in careers where this is an advantage, such as art, media, architecture, creativity, engineering and inventing things – that entrepreneurial thinking.

Did you know that GCHQ, the government’s intelligence, security and cyber agency, is three to four times more likely to take on apprentices with dyslexia than other apprenticeship schemes, due to their ability to recognise complex patterns in data and their intuitive ability to crack puzzles?   GCHQ believes that taking on dyslexic individuals is mission critical.  Kate Briggs writes “The impact of dyslexia on keeping us safe as a nation is rarely discussed.  It’s fantastic to get such a candid insight into how spies who are made by dyslexia are able to use their dyslexic thinking skills to perform such important work.”

The irony isn’t lost on me that the founder of Quest Cognitive Hypnotherapy, Trevor Silvester, has dysnumeria – a form of dyslexia – which has given him a talent for seeing patterns, which is what our therapy is all about: seeing the client’s problem pattern, and matching it to a therapeutic solution.

There is a long way to go in understanding and making allowances for the neurodivergent community but there is also much to celebrate.  If you are someone with dyslexia or suspect you  may be dyslexic, know that you can succeed and that anything is possible. And we are here to help.

Natalie has spent the last 24 years working as a Production Manager in the television broadcast sector. She has had a rewarding career where she has met many talented people and worked on many high-profile events such as the Wimbledon Championships, the US Open, and the Asia X Games. On the other end of the spectrum, she has also worked with a high-end fashion client, Moncler, at London Fashion Week.

Natalie’s experience is varied and she has achieved this whilst juggling word-processing dyslexia. In 2019, she set up her Cognitive Hypnotherapy and NLP practice to help guide and support dyslexic individuals like her who struggle with low self-esteem and confidence.

If you are interested in finding a QCH therapist, you can find them using our therapist finder here https://www.qchpa.com/therapist-finder/#!directory/map/ord=rnd